Who? My Past? I will probably not to call you back.
Couple of weeks ago, I found three emails in my inbox…they were from my past. Today I received a call from my past as well. Do you know what? Maybe three months ago, I will cry and laugh because it happened but now I was so cold and feel nothing inside of my soul or body…just nothing. To make a long story short, when I said my past, I mean my ex-boyfriend, my thoughts and feelings and probably love to him… I was depressed for 5 months straight when he decided to switch me for another girl… I gained 20 pounds and I lost my reality and my goals. I stopped to learn on my college and became from A- to a D-student.
Thanks to my friends, they were here with and to me. I started to live again… I’ve got 4 days straight on my old job… I started to study and read everything from novels to psych books to “kill my time”… I started to spend my free time in the library and left it at 10pm… I joined my gym again… I lost a few pounds and I do not want to stop… I started to listen my parents and accept their view points, they are more important than social networks and friends’ advises… I spent my weekends in Metropolitan Museum and Guggenheim… I found a new places to calm down: Empire State Bld, Rockefeller and Brooklyn Bridge… I stopped to cry… and guess what? I found a man… or maybe he found me… I started to smile and enjoy my every day life… I started to believe again… and be honest with an opposite, I mean my man. I changed my mind about my goals and I have priorities that differs from my previous one. I started to love myself and do not pay attention on my background… because we are, each of us is a person with his/her own personality. How I mentioned before on my blog (Discrimination in Love), we cannot judge each other based on religion, skin color, background, culture and other stupid stuff. I would like to thank everybody who replied to my emails and depressed status-es 🙂 I am very appreciated…
Two weeks ago, when I started to receive these strange emails… I was confused but my backup was here to me. They supported me and I realized that I do not need to come back to my past because I have my Present and My Future. I know I was in love (or something similar) and had plans with somebody but for now it is not that important than to make my Significant One happy than ever. I changed my mind about my ideal man and person who should be next to me… I changed my mind about everything and I understood that nobody will hurt you if he/she truly respect, love and believe in you. I know this post is more private but if it could help somebody, it makes me smile… My advise is – Do not waste your time with people who doesn’t want to spend it with you…and never come back to your Past… you have to learn from your mistakes, not to come back and look at them again.